...beyond time and words

Very apprehensive I entered into his present. I din’t know what to expect. I din’t know what he expects from me. Yet here was a knot that tied our lives together. With my hands in his, as I looked at his face, there were hopes of a future that was lively, colorful, peaceful. It was a new beginning for both of us. As he looked back at me I felt waves of similar thoughts touch me. His eyes filled me with a feel of acceptance. There was a readiness to share himself with me. I wasn’t sure, if I was ready. I guess it would take me time. But the warmth in his eyes was very reassuring. MY life had now begun.

I never had imagined that things done in routine would ever amuse me. But surprisingly they did. I found myself standing still and smiling while I watched him button up his shirt or sip his coffee while struggling to reach the sports page of the newspaper. What was so amusing…I still don’t know! Watching his eyes follow me as I went about doing my household chores, his shifting his place while reading the newspaper, so he is always around me, a comment on the happenings of the world thrown in the air, inviting me to share my opinion, all just to start a conversation…showed me what he felt for me. When he stopped following me, I would look back with my eyes searching for him and he knew I felt the same.

Life went on. We had children. His business underwent ups and downs. We shifted houses and places. We saw our son almost dying in front of us and heaved a sigh of relief as he recovered. We have celebrated festivals, seen big buildings come up and spoil the serenity of our house, seen prime ministers and presidents come and go. Still, every morning I watch myself smile as I see him buttoning up his shirt or sip his coffee while struggling to reach the sports page of the newspaper.

Today, as I go for a walk in the park with him, I feel his pace slowing. His walks are getting shorter each day. His breathing is strenuous, but his grasp over my hand is as tight as always. The brightness in his eyes as he sets them on me is still the same. He still shifts his place to be constantly around me, still throws a comment in the air to start a conversation. Yes. MY life has been lively, colorful and peaceful as I hoped it would be. I have shared my soul with him. I have been part of his soul.

As our days come to an end, I hope to die with my hand still in his grasp.

.......My granma’s reply to me, when I expressed my fears on getting married to someone I don't know at all!!